Hiroji's High School Reunion
by fuuko no miko
Summary: a ficcy wiccy starring my favorite oddball couple Joker and Neonhan !
1. An Invitation

Hiroji's High School Reunion *_*

by Fuuko no Miko

June 8, 2000

3:58 AM

Part 1: An Inivitation

Hello! This is my second *attempt* at writing a comedic fic *_* or at least thats what it tries to be. Anyway....this one takes place a couple of months after "[Enchanted][1]" and still stars one of my favorite oddball couples (Errr...come to think of it, is there any other???) Joker-san and Neon-han ^_~. This goes out to Jok....er....Bottou-chan ^_^ the sponsor of the fic....some parts of the fic reflect (i.e, copy) notes from Bottou-chan's amusing "Sherlock Joker". Now to begin your trip into a whole lotta nonsense, begin....

*******

"AAAAAARGGGGHHHH!!!!"

The blood-curdling scream echoed through the mansion like a haunted melody. A dozen footsteps running in from different directions started scurrying towards a common point, this one being the front door of the Uruha mansion. The Uruha squad, was used to hearing such hair-raising bellows as part of their job description and everyday lifestyle. Things as such did not summon them from their engrossing game of Tekken on the Playstation or from watching the newest blood-and-guts release on HBO R-21 special (as seen only on Mori Kouran's cable systems). But this particular one did, as the familiarity of the voice struck them, that of a fellow bloodthirsty killer. They all rushed, dropping the joystick, the buttered popcorn and anyone who might've been sitting on their lap (Mikoto can be seen limping after Mokuren drops her off "in surprise", as he explains later to Miko-chan and her robot^^;;;) to the source of the sound. And there it was...a fallen body, that of a fortysomething, going-for-bald man with a duffel bag on his shoulder and a huge lump on his head. Above him stood a tall, rasta-braided punk (Joker: Oi, be nice with my description! Or feel the wrath of....)...let me repeat that....Above him stood a tall, handsome, eye-droppingly sexy, oozing with sex appeal (Raiha: Liars go to hell you know ^_^...). ^^;;; Anyway...Above him stood the tall, iron-clad assassin wielding the Taishaku Kaiten, a look of pure shock registered on his features, his mouth slightly parting open in awe. In his hand, he clutched a pretty beige envelope with an invitation partly opened.

"How in the world did they find me?" he muttered to no one in particular.

"Oi, Joker-sama, why did you kill the postman?" Aki kneeled to check the swirly-eyed bearer of the bad news. He was still alive, only knocked *severely* unconscious.

Miki was sorting through the fallen, scattered mail. "I wonder if Bandai sent me my Card Captor Sakura trading cards yet?"

Tsukushiro was rummaging along with her, "Yeuuuww...you watch that show? Ugh!" he snorted in disgust. He then jumped up with glee, holding a package. "Oh such joy! My Pokemon set is here!!!!"

"Oiya, are you alright?" Raiha asked his friend who was still in a state of oblivion, waving his katana in front of the arrogant one's face.

"Hello, 911? There's been an accident...no...he's alive...just a little dazed," Neon was already on the phone. "Uruha mansion...yeah another one. The usual. Not my fault this place is so accident-prone!" she slammed the phone down and turned to Kurei's right hand man. "What's wrong with him now?" she went in front of Joker and waved a hand in his face, eliciting no reaction. An idea popped into Neon's head and she proceeded to unbutton the top three buttons of her blouse, stopping just at the point where she saw his eyes move and his nose bleed.

"Hentai!!!!" she whacked him senseless, almost knocking him over Raiha who stood behind him. Joker held his head, now with a lump protruding on it. Neon could be heard laughing at the background as she proceeded to return to the den, commenting on how a little skin made putty out of men.

Seeing there was no immediate threat to life and limb (and being disappointed at that), they all treaded back to their respective places, leaving Raiha holding the bag...er...the man.

"I can't imagine how in the world they were able to find me here..." Joker said to Raiha as the latter handed him an ice bag. They were now sitting on the bar at the Uruha mansion's den. "Track me down...all the way from Osaka...to here..." he shook his head disbelievingly.

"Them who?" Raiha asked. Joker motioned to the invitation on the table which Raiha picked up. It stated:

_*******_

_This serves as an invitation to_

_Odokemono Hiroji_

_Osaka Academy_

_Class of 1990_

_High School Reunion_

_Kenzo Hall_

_Four Seasons Hotel_

_June 8th, 2000_

_7:00 P.M._

_Attire: Strictly Formal_

_May bring one guest_

_RSVP: 1-800-211-0912 Kaidou Gozairu_

_1-800-911-9111 Kakoru Watanabe_

_*******_

Raiha shrugged, smiling, "Is this what's gotten you all so rattled-up...**_Hiroji_**?" and though he tried to stifle it, the purple-haired bishounen couldn't help but snicker realizing his friend's dilemma.

*Thwack*

The ice pack found it's way across Raiha's forehead, and it was his turn to become starry-eyed. "DO NOT CALL ME HIROJI!!!!!" exclaimed the bigger of the two men. "I can't believe they were able to track me down...all that distance..."

"What are you so worried about anyway? Raiha wondered. "It's just a High School Reunion."

"YOU never went to high school." Joker pointed out. "So you don't know what it's like." he looked up in a dreamstate, remembering his days of teenage glory.

**_"Oooohhh....Hiroji-san!!!!" the girls would swoon eveytime he passed by, with the cool, hairspray-drowning Motley-Crue hairdo, the slick black leather jacket with skintight pants and knock-em-dead Cowboy cum biker boots. He had shades back then, so nobody could see his tantalizing amber-gold-flecked babies. Back then, only the girls he thought who deserved it can take a gander at his hard-to-find ogglers._**

**_"He's my kind of guy." the envious other male students would say. And they would put their shades on in reverence of the cool one._**

"You sure that's not just one of your sake-infested delusions?" Raiha joked, as his friend related his old glory days in high school as one of the campus big shots.

"Every other male wanted to be me." Joker spoke dreamily. "I was the most popular guy in school. I wasn't just Hiroji Odekomono. I was *the Hiroji*...the very definition of cool..."

"What scares him is that those bakas who think so highly of him have finally awakened to the truth that he's just another rasta-braided punk with a whole lotta hairspray." Neon interrupted as she passed by to get some cheesecake from the fridge.

Joker eyed her smugly, "Such a wisecrack you are Neon-han. Bet you had braces and coke-bottle glasses when you were in high school."

Neon smirked. "I was Homecoming Queen four years in a row in high school, and Prom queen twice."

"Where'd you go to, an all-boys school?" Joker retaliated.

Raiha squirmed in between before Neon could douse the pastry on Joker's face. "Oiya, don't let such a delicious dessert go to waste." he reasoned, and Neon snorted before returning to the living room. The purple-haired ninja then turned back to his companion. "So what's the problem?"

Joker sighed, "I was a bigshot in High School. But now...I don't feel...let's just say I guess I didn't live up quite to my expectation. And theirs too...perhaps..."

"What do you mean?" Raiha asked. "You're one of the elite Uruha, Jyushinshuu at that. One of Kurei-sama's top men. You earn a six-figure salary, live in a mansion, have a number of luxury cars at your disposal...what more could you ask for?"

Joker shrugged. "Well...I suppose..." he paused to think, and realized Raiha had a point. "The money, the cars, that wouldn't be a problem...but how do I tell everyone that I'm the top assassin for Kurei Mori, son of the philantropist Mori Kouran without having everybody run for their lives? It's not a good impression."

"Oooo..." Raiha nodded. "I should've thought...Joker needs to make a good impression on everybody since he wants everyone to think he's the same king-of-cool Hiroji who used to rule the High School Roster, ne? It's all about image..."

The other Uruha sweatdropped, "It took you a while to get it, didn't you?"

"You never did get straight to the point." Raiha pointed out.

Joker threw the invitation to the trash compactor. "Everybody expected me to be like, you know, a celebrity. John Wayne, or Bruce Willis...or Harrison Ford...that kind." His shoulders slumped. "Not that I don't like what I do...because I do. It's just that...I guess I am not as much of a hotshot as I wanted to be...as everyone expected me to be...I guess..."

"Is this the Joker I know?" Raiha eclaimed in surprise. "Why, if I'm not mistaken, you sound a little...errr....insecure."

"Shut up, smartass." Joker said. "How can you be not insecured? Here I am, hiding behind an iron mask, me...Hiroji Odekomono. Assassin. While everyone else in my class is either an award-winning director, or a shipping tycoon, or a rock star.... I'm...just a shadow..." he propped his face on his elbow. "I can't brag to the whole wide world my status, no matter how incredibly great it is....whatever am I going to tell them?"

**_"Hiroji-sama! What have you been doing all these years?" his former claasmates in awe are going to ask._**

**_"Well, I wield this hot rockin' ancient Hokage madougu that controls gravity and I am one of the top neck-slashin, merciless, bloodthirsty hitokiris of this 420-year old guy with an iron mask, who shoots blue flames from his hand and who can absorb dead people and make them into a sacred flame."_**

**_And they'll be running off like a bunch of scared gazelles._**

"Not a very pleasant scenario, is it?" Joker asked. He sighed, "Which is why I am not going. Blast them all."

"But Joker-san, if you don't go, all the more they're going to think you're hiding something." Raiha reasoned. "They'll think, Hiroji must be doing something illegal, immoral or worse....fattening..." he laughed.

"Joker-san!!!!!" Kirin called from the living room, "Phone call."

Joker picked up the extension. "Konnichi-wa."

"Hiroji?" a voice asked from the other line. "It's me, Kaidou! From Osaka Academy."

His biggest rival in high school.

"Oi, Kaidou-han! How are you?" he asked in false joy. Joker loved Kaidou as much as he would Mikoto...not at all.

"Fabulous!" the other man replied. "I own a law firm in Osaka, with 12 of the best lawyers in the land under my wing. Just the other day I bought a brand new yacht. And my supermodel wife just gave birth to my second son. And you?"

He hasn't changed a bit, Joker annoyingly thought. "I'm doing absolutely great, thank you." he said. "Why did you call?"

"Why I just thought I'd invite you over to see my Mercedes collection." he bragged. Joker was already twisting the phone wire on the other line. "Nah, I'm in charge of the Alumni Association. I was wondering if you were coming."

There was silence on the other line. "I'm afraid I can't, Kaidou-han, my friend. My business keeps me pretty busy these days." Let's see, Joker thought...there was this loan shark he had to exterminate, two more thugs Kurei wanted sent floating to Tokyo Bay, and another one from Fukoka he wanted taught a lesson....

"You can't be that busy...." Kaidou said. "I'm sure whatever business you have, you could leave in the hands of your competent assistants?"

"Well I..."

"Or don't you have assistants?" Kaidou inquired.

Joker wanted to pull the other man by the collar and show him the extensive little army he was in charge of. "It's not that..."

"Then you must come." Kaidou insisted. "Everybody's dying to know what the *cool Hiroji Odekomono* is doing these days." the sarcasm in the other man's voice was evident.

"Then I will." Joker replied, apparently back to his arrogant self. "And you better be ready when I do."

"I'm looking forward to it." the other man replied just a s smugly. "Bye."

"Bye."

Raiha looked at Joker, and even though he couldn't quite see it, he knew that there was determination in his friend's eyes.

That afternoon, at one of Tokyo's biggest malls, two young men could be seen hopping designer shop after designer shop, trying every bit of formal wear available.

"What do you think of this one?" Joker turned posing like a model.

"Looks fine by me." Raiha sweatdropped. This was the thirteenth outfit Joker had tried on, and the saleslady was geting impatient.

They bought a whopping Armani after the 20th fitting, much to Joker's delight and Raiha's relief.

"Have that one polished for use next week." Joker instructed one of the household helps, pointing to a beautiful black Rolls-Royce.

"You sure Kurei-sama wouldn't mind you using his precious Satori?" Raiha asked, referring to Kurei's beloved car.

"No. He said I could have it as long as I have it cleaned and waxed afterwards." Joker shrugged. He didn't mention he had to plea bargain with Kurei for two hours just to borrow it. That and promise to take Kurei's pit bull Ryuken for his afternoon walk for two weeks in a row.

With everything set, Joker was ready for the reunion as he'll ever be. All was going as planed and scheduled. There was just one more thing to take care of...

"A woman." Joker said, pacing back and forth in Raiha's room. "Every successful man needs a lovely woman in tow to tell everyone know who he is." he paused to ponder. "You needn't have a harem of women hanging all over you...just one who packs in a lot of impact. And besides...they'll probably be all over me when I get there...I just need one...to create a little impression..."

"Let's see..." Raiha thought as he lied in bed. "A woman...you couldn't possibly hire one, I suppose?"

"I'd prefer someone from the Uruha..." Joker said. "So she can ride along with the little facade..."

"There aren't that many females in the Uruha..." Raiha enumerated in his brain. "Miki?"

"She's pretty...but a little immature. I need a woman of the world...."

"Kirin?"

"No...she'll never want to be too far away from Rasen for too long. And those shades..." Joker shuddered.

"Aki?"

"No...she might go around flirting with the musicians...or worse...the waiters..."

"Mikoto?"

"I said a woman, Raiha."

"Menou?"

"They'll think she's my little sister.... or I'll be labelled a pedophile."

"Neon?"

A flicker appeared in Joker's unseen eyes.

"Absolutely not!" Neon screamed in protest. "I'd rather jump off the Cursed Cliffs than be seen hanging around the likes of you. Ugh." she shuddered and turned away.

"Don't be such a hypocrite, Neon-han." a corner of Joker's mouth lifted. "I know how you really feel. You don't have to hide it." One of his eyebrows lifted. "Cursed Cliffs, eh? You still remember..."

Neon rushed to cover Joker's mouth with her hand before he could disclose anything further in front of Raiha. "That is classified information, if you remember right, Hiroji?" she threatened menacingly.

"What's all this racket about?" Kurei came in from the entertainment room. He was in his kawaii Ninja Scroll pyjamas complete with his armed Jibbei plushie. He stifled a yawn as he took the La-Z-Boy recliner opposite the quarreling parties.

"Joker wants me to pretend to be his mistress during his high school reunion." Neon accused. "Apparently he couldn't get a girl dumb enough to want to be."

Joker walked over to Kurei and whispered something in the latter's ear. A small smile found itself on the Master of The Blue Flame's lips. His gaze shifted to the pretty, red-haired assassin. "Why don't you then?"

Neon's eyes were bulging out of their sockets. "No way. It'll tarnish my image as an intelligent, sensible woman."

"What if I order you to?" Kurei asked.

Her jaw dropped, "Kurei-sama...you...you...you can't be serious...." she shot a stare of pure disdain at the fanged Uruha assassin who was grinning like the Chesire cat.

"And if I am?" Kurei's eyebrows shot up. Neon was absolutely speechless. "You wouldn't want to go against my wishes...would you now, Neon?"

Neon bowed her head, eyes downcast in obedience. "Then I shall carry on your orders, Kurei-sama. Your wish is my command..."

Kurei smiled. "Very good."

Neon stepped on Joker's foot when she passed by him on her way out.

The day of reckoning arrived. Kurei had given Joker the day off and had arranged one of his chauffeurs to drive his two assasins to Osaka. Joker dressed in the expensive black Armani suit he had bought and had his hair done in a Jose Eber branch downtown. He awaited for Neon at the living room, watching an episode of Flame of Recca on the TV as he did.

"Ever wonder if those animators at Studio Pierrot had something against the Uruha?" he said aloud. "They make Raiha into a stiff...and I don't even get three minutes of airtime!"

"If you ask me, they know exactly what they're doing. Cutting off your unnecessary self-appreciative remarks." a tart reply came from behind.

Joker turned around, recognizing the voice, "Neon-han!!!!"

No, that was not a shout of glee. It was more of an expression of appall. For behind the fanged Uruha assassin stood the flute-playing, fiery-haired member of the Jyushinshuu. Her hair in a severe knot on top of her head, donned in a black dress, the neckline extending all the way up her neck, with long sleeves and the hemline all the way down to her calves.

"You...you..." and Joker burst out laughing. "You look like...like Julie Andrews....no...(LOL) you look like Mary Poppins!!!!"

Neon's veins popped. "What do you mean I look like Mary Poppins?"

But Joker could no longer answer, as he was already turning blue with laughter.

Neon stormed out of the living room with her chin up. She came back fifteen minutes later, this time dressed in a glittery midnight blue Donna Karan number. The top had a sweetheart neckline, dipping low and enhancing her assets. It hugged her voluptous figure, with the curves in all the right places. A slit on the side extended mid-thigh. She put on her diamonds and her blue satin pumps. Her hair flowed dramatically in waves on her bare shoulders. She wrapped a matching shawl to complete the look.

"Who looks like Mary Poppins?" she challenged icily.

Joker stopped laughing. An appreciative stare replaced his facial expression. "Shall we?" he offered his left arm.

She walked past him, her nose in the air. "Only when we get to Osaka."

The long hours on the road didn't seem to count. Joker was singing along to old, late 80s to early 90s hits on the CD player in the car despite Neon's vehement protests. To get myself in the mood, he had reasoned out. Neon merely covered her ears and began counting mileposts, hoping that they get to Osaka before her eardrums burst.

The Four Seasons Hotel was one of the most elegant Neon had ever laid eyes upon. Five-star, first class. It would give the Uruha mansion a run for its money. Kurei's chauffeur Fumio set them down at the hotel lobby but not before parading the grand car in front of every guest that passed. Joker was the first to step out, and he handed out a hand to Neon when she did. She linked her arm around his as they made their entrance.

Joker was all smiles as heads turned their way. Obviously every single cent he had spent on the suit was worth it. And every sharp remark his lovely companion threw him was worth bearing it too. To say that Neon was stunning was a severe understatement. She made every other female they passed look like a damsel-in-waiting. She radiated the kind of class and elegance that was born, not bred. He knew he made the right choice of partner. They were greeted by a warm smile from the lady seated in the registration area.

"Hiroji-san...is that you?" she blurted out excitedly.

Joker nodded. "Of course. Who else carries himself with such suave the way I do?" he bragged.

Neon looked heavenwards.

The other woman looked smitten, however. "Oh, you haven't changed much." she said, starry-eyed. She wrote his name on the guest list and handed him a name tag. "And you are..." she asked Neon.

"Neon." the red-haired assassin replied, shaking the other woman's hand. "I'm his date for tonight..."

"You lucky lady!" she giggled. Neon stifled a snort. "You know in high school, a load of us girls would do anything to even get Hiroji's attention for just 2 minutes."

"Really?" Neon smiled, trying hard not to burst out laughing. "How lucky of me, indeed." she eyed her companion warily.

"Well, have fun." the lady bid before attending to another newly-arrived guest.

Neon couldn't help herself and began laughing her head off. "I can't believe they think you're an icon here." she tried suppressing it and hurt her cheeks doing so. "They must've had a school of nerds."

"Shhhh..." Joker hushed. He led his giggling escort to the grand ballroom where a large banner stated "WELCOME BACK CLASS OF 1990." There was a stage where musicians played songs of the high school years and a wide dance floor. Tables were elegantly decorated and made a circle on the ballroom. An usher led Joker and Neon to a table near the stage. There they were joined by another couple, one of Joker's old friends named Daijirou and his pregnant wife. The two men tried to outbrag the other and Neon could do nothing but shake her head in disbelief. Daijirou's wife didn't say much...heck she didn't say anything at all other than the customary greeting when they first sat at the table. Neon merely made a visual assessment of whoever was in attendance, criticizing their hair, their clothes, their husbands...just to keep herself from being bored.

A tall, handsome man made his way to the stage and took the microphone. "Konnichi-wa!" he announced. "I am Kaidou Gozairu and I am your host for tonight. Welcome everyone to the reunion of Class 90 of Osaka Academy!!!!"

The night had officially begun.

**[TO BE CONTINUED][2]**

[BACK TO THE FANFIC SECTION][3]

   [1]: jokerneon.html
   [2]: hiroji2.html
   [3]: fanfic.html



	2. Good Times, Bad Times

Hiroji's High School Reunion *_*

by Fuuko no Miko

June 10, 2000

4:02 PM

Part 2: Good Times, Bad Times

[Previous Chapter][1]

Okay, this part doesn't have as much *comedy* (or at least what tries to be comedic ^^;;;) as the first one.Some mush. Maybe some lime. A little drama. Read it before you think of activating your Fukyo Waons please ^^...   
*******   
The night went on smoothly. Joker's story to everyone who passed by their table was that he worked as an important attache for the son of the billionaire philantropist cum politician Mori Kouran. And everybody knew who that was. They listened in awe to his stories...which for the most part were true. Joker didn't disclose much as he had said his work was highly confidential. And everybody was satsified with that. Neon was the sweet-charming-girl-he's-seeing-right-now. Her heart swelled with all the compliments they threw her way, as well as the wolf-whistles, the appreciative glances...all of to which she simply replied that she was already "taken." Only she mentally added that her heart belonged to the owner of the Rolls-Royce...the real one that is.

After dinner, Joker excused himself to join a couple of friends for a drink. Neon simply nodded, happy to get away from her arrogant companion if only for a few minutes. She was about to get up to go to the ladies' room when a man took a seat opposite her.

"Hi." he reached out a hand. "My name is Kaidou Gozairu."

Joker sauntered off to the bar to join a couple of his old high school buddies. They laughed, having a drink of expensive wine when one of the men piped up.

"Look out." Yoshihiro, one of the men, said. "Here comes Satsuki."

All men turned their heads to the direction the former noted. And indeed there she was, Satsuki Narazaki. Numero uno class b*tch. Joker swallowed. The girl had been running after him since they were in diapers. She was severely persistent despite his innumerable rejections. Now as she approached them, Joker felt his skin crawl. Satsuki wasn't exactly ugly, but her face could certainly do better. It wasn't her appearance but her attitude that pushed all the wrong buttons. She would make even the likes of Mikoto desirable.

"Hello boys..." she spoke in a sultry voice. She put an arm around Joker's waist. "Hi Hiro-chan. Long time no see...." she said in a more amorous tone. "Long time no touch either." she ran a finger vertically across his chest, teasing.

Joker moved away. "Nice to see you too, Satsuki."

"I know." she whispered. As if on cue, all the other men disappeared, leaving the two of them behind. Joker was furious. "So how about you and me have some catching up to do, hmmmm?" she whispered, standing on her toes and licking hie earlobe.

The Uruha assassin gently pushed her away. "I'm sorry Satsuki. I'm a committed man." he said firmly.

"Really?" one of her tattoed eyebrows raised, "To whom? That little Tokyo tart you brought along?" she inquired   
annoyingly.

"Neon-han is not a Tokyo tart." he corrected sternly. "She's a beautiful, sensible, sweet woman." And he meant every word that he said.

"We'll see about that." Satsuki said venomously and left.

Joker breathed a sigh of relief when the other woman left. He was about to return to his table when he saw Neon speaking to Kaidou. The Kaidou. The one rival he had in high school and he could most certainly do without. Joker made a sound in his throat when he arrived at the table.

"Oh, Hiroji." Kaidou acknowledged his presence. "I was just talking to your lovely date here."

"She's not my date." he corrected. Neon's eyes widened. "She's my fiancee."

Thankfully Kaidou didn't notice that Neon's jaw had dropped and she was staring at Joker as if he had grown an extra head.

"Oh." was all he could say. The other man shrugged and bid farewell. "You're a lucky man, Odekomono." he patted Joker's shoulder before leaving. "She's an incredible woman."

"YOUR WHAT????" Neon raised her voice. "This wasn't in the agreement!"

The fanged assassin hushed her. "Keep your voice down, Neon-han. We don't want to make a scene."

"I am to going to make a scene." she protested vehemently. "I agreed to come here only because Kurei-sama told me so, and that is as your escort, date, companion. I didn't come to be...."

"Excuse me, Hiroji-san." one of the ushers interrupted. "The host asks if you and your fiancee would like to lead the evening's first dance."

"Sure." Joker obliged. Neon took a couple of seconds before accepting the hand he reached out to her.

"As I was saying." she spoke as they began gliding on the dance floor to the lazy tune of Unchained Melody. "I came here only to be your date of sorts...your woman of the moment...not to be introduced to every freaking classmate of yours as Mrs. Odekomono!"

The fanged one sighed. "Look, I....apologize Neon-han. I only said that to ward off some very persistent admirer."

"That dumb-looking brunette who was crawling all over you a while ago?" she snorted. "Looks like there are a lot of desperate nutcases in your school. Hmmmp."

Something flickered in Joker's unseen eye. "Oi....is that jealousy I hear?" he teased.

"Don't flatter yourself!" Neon exclaimed, her veins popping out. "If you ask me, you deserve each other."

"And what about Kaidou-han taking interest in you? Don't you think that would be traitorous to your fiance?" Joker asked.

"Kaidou is a gentleman." she remarked. "Unlike some men I know...who pretend to be what they're not."

"Whose side are you on anyway?"

"Mine." Neon snarled. "The earlier I get out of here the better. I am beginning to become bored and pissed and...umph..."

Neon could speak no longer as her lips were sealed by Joker's mouth. He had taken her lips in a kiss so quick she never knew what hit her. She closed her eyes instinctively, initially resisting but having her barriers break down in a matter of seconds.

His kiss was warm, tender, gentle....and she could feel the thrill down to her toes.

Just like last time...her subconscious spoke...how long was it? Four...five months ago? And yet it was as potent and as mind-numbing as it used to be....

She opened her eyes when he lifted his lips from hers. They were met by a soft amber gaze, looking apologetic if anything else. "They were beginning to look." he explained. And the red-haired Uruha said nothing.

After trotting to three tunes, Neon excused herself and went to get a drink at the bar. She was on her third Subzero when Kaidou approached her again.

"Hi." he said.

"Oh, hi." Neon greeted back. She was beginning to feel tipsy.

"Where's Hiroji?" he inquired, eyes shifting left and right.

"I dunno. Hopping around I guess..." she said. She noted Joker was at their table, with a tequila in his left hand and Satsuki on his lap. Neon shook her head. His lap!!!!

Kaidou didn't seem to notice her discomfort. "Hey, how would you like to join the Karaoke Fest we have lined up next?"

Neon shook her head, "Oh, I'm afraid I'm not much for singing." she said, stealing a glance at Joker who now had Satsuki shamelessly crawling on him. "But Hiroji-san is." she smiled wickedly.

Kaidou's eyes narrowed. "Hiroji can sing?"

She nodded. "Didn't you know? It's one of his many unrecognized attributes." she laughed. "You should hear him do Achy-Breaky Heart. He puts Billy Ray Cyrus to shame."

"I'll do that." Kaidou said. A stage hand then motioned to him. "Excuse me, I think we're starting the Karaoke Fest."

"I am going to do what????" Joker couldn't believe his ears when his name was called.

"I believe they want you to lead the songfest." Daijirou spoke. "Err....I didn't know you could sing Hiroji."

"Neither did I." Joker echoed.

Joker took to the mike when his classmates goaded him. He sweat profusely despite the strong air conditioning, standing there in front of a hundred eager faces. Suddenly all his arrogance flushed down the bowl. He looked around and saw Neon proudly beaming behind the PA system. She was giving him a double thumbs up sign and cheering, "Go Hiroji!"

Realizing how he got into this mess, he spoke at the microphone. "I would like to invite my fiancee, Neon-han to join me on stage."

Neon grew pale. The next thing she knew she was being pushed by a dozen hands towards the stage.

"A-one, two, three..."

"Don't tell my heart, my achy-breaky heart...I just don't think he'd understand...."

Fifteen minutes later, and after a nerve-wracking performance of "Build Me Up Buttercup" and "Head Over Heels,"the two Uruha assassins sat floppily on their dinner table. Their bodies profuse with sweat and their dignity broken beyond repair. Nobody seemed to notice though, as everybody sang along drunk-happy to the tunes of "Papa Don't Preach" performed by Satsuki.

"Neon-han...I never realized you hate me so..." Joker spoke in phrases, his voice raspy from trying to disguise his non-singing voice. "How could you do this to me?"

"Do what?" Neon snarled through her panting. "You're the one who owes me bigtime." She sobbed. "Imagine dragging me all the way from Tokyo and telling everybody I'm your fiancee....and still having the nerve to perform a quickie in front of everybody with that slut in the yellow canary dress."

Joker grew quiet. It was a while before he spoke up again. "Is that why you did what you did?" he aksed. "You're mad at me because of Satsuki????" the mischievous glint returned to his eyes. "So I am right when I percieve that you are indeed jealous of that little tramp?"

He was answered by a wallop from her purse. "THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!" she screamed. She then toned her voice down. "Look, you drag me here, against my wishes and introduce to everyone that I am your wedded-to-be. Now while I object severely to that, I still let you play your little game, because for one, I am your friend. And because another, Kurei-sama told me so. Now, if you fooled around with that annoying little weasel, in front of my eyes. Don't you think it's going to make me look stupid?" she asked. "And you know me, Joker. I do not like being made to look like the fool." Neon bowed her head, trying to keep the tears of embarassment from falling.

They were silent for a number of minutes after that. Joker was the first to break it. "I'm sorry Neon-han, if I made you feel that way." he tilted her chin and met her eyes with his. She could feel the sincerity coming from him. "I didn't do that on purpose. And Heaven forbid...you know I'd never stoop to the level of that...that woman." he sighed. "The only reason you saw her sitting on me was because she was *trying to have her way.* I would've pushed her off, but that would be very ungentlemanly." he explained. "So I just gave her a piece of my mind and she walked away."

Another eerie silence followed, interrupted only by the loud music from the PA system which was now blaring "Super Sonic."

"Sorry." Neon said.

"I'm sorry too." Joker spoke softly. "Why don't we just forget this and have a good time, eh, Neon-han?"

"Okay."

Joker pulled her hand and they once again joined the noisy group who were rapping along with a very drunk Daijirou who was rapping and stomping along with the dance hit.

After two hours of ear-piercing singing, the Alumni then returned to boogeing on the dance floor. This time however, they played ballroom songs for a slower pace. The dance floor was filled with couples duking it out. Joker and Neon were at the bar, each taking a sip of Scotch while feasting on some caviar.

Neon stood up and held out her hand to Joker.

He looked at her in surprise.

"Well?" she asked. "Don't you want to dance?"

"Uhhhh...okay." he answered tentatively. The music had changed from a foxtrot into a tango.

"This is one of my best dances." she told him.

"I didn't know you could really dance." Joker admitted. "As in ballroom dance...you know...."

"You never asked." she smiled sweetly.

Neon didn't know he could dance either. And the tango! The kind of dance that needed a certain chemistry and understanding between partners. They swept through the floor gracefully, coordinately, as if they've done it a dozen times before. The rhythm, the timing, the skill...the floor was cleared of dancers just to give the two of them room. They were watched in awe by a dazzled audience. It was reminiscent of Al Pacino in Scent of A Woman. And when they finished, they were met a thunderous applause. Neon and Joker took a bow before retreating back to the bar.

"You were great, Neon-han." the fanged Uruha assassin complimented.

"You too." she admitted.

They were then mobbed by a number of alumni who all of a sudden wanted to learn to tango.

It was 2 in the morning when they finished. Neon held on to Joker for support as she was dazed with drunkedness and exhaustion. She no longer objected to him having his arm around her waist. She almost didn't notice that instead of heading for the door, they were heading off to the hotel counter.

"We're not going home yet?" she barely got the words out as her lids felt heavy.

"Not tonight we aren't." Joker replied. "I've booked a room. We're staying over."

The red-haired assassin protested, saying she had brought no changing clothes as he half-dragged her to the elevator. She had begun to come around when he opened the key to their hotel room, a luxurious suite on the 21st floor, especially when she noted there was only one bed.

"Is this deja vu all over again?" Neon complained. "I refuse to be possessed by another cursed spirit."

Joker snickered as his assisted Neon to the bed. She laid there while he took off her shoes and set them aside.

"Is this another attempt of yours trying to stick me and Joker in a lemon fic?" Neon glares at the author.

"Wai! Wai! Neon-han, of course not! Look at Joker-san over there." the author sweatdrops.

He threw a set of her Pikachu pajamas by her feet. "Here. Change into something more decent."

"Not in front of you I aint!" she declared. "Where'd you get this anyway?"

Joker held out a small travelling bag. "I asked Aki to pack you a weekend bag, complete with everything you might need."

"Whatever am I going to do with a weekend bag?"

"To spend the weekend of course." he smiled conspiratorily. "Kurei-sama gave you the weekend off."

"What for?"

Joker rolled his eyes heavenward. "I'm taking you to a tour of Osaka, that's what for." he crossed his arms over his chest. "I'll take you around the city, maybe a few parks, gardens...what ever tourist spots there may be..."

Neon raised her brows. "Why?"

Joker plopped beside Neon on the bed. She reflexively moved away. "Because you were nice enough to accompany me here and be my baby for a while. It's my way of showing gratitude."

She shot him a look of pure disbelief.

"Why do you think Kurei-sama allowed me to drag you all the way here? Remember that night he ordered you to come with me? That's because I told him it'd be good for you to have a little sun. You've been working too hard Neon-han, and we suppose you needed a break. I told Kurei-sama if he let me take you here to be my date for one night, I'll take you around the city. That's why he said yes."

"I thought you told him you'd bring him home a box of your Grandmother's special Osaka fudge brownies if he let me come with you." she accused.

"That and the trip." Joker clarified.

Neon was speechless.

"But that doesn't mean I'm going to sleep next to you..." she stressed, her eyes fixing on the single bed in the suite.

"Who said anything about sleeping with me?" he snickered, throwing the hotel room's key to Neon. He waved another key that he drew from his pocket. "I'll be in the other room if you need me. Good night, Neon-han."

"Good night."

It was a good thing he had his back turned, otherwise, he's definitely make a wisecrack about the crimson in her cheeks.

He took her around the city in the days that followed. He brought her to a 6th-century Buddhist Temple, Tennoji Park, and the recreation of Shogun Toyomoti Hideyoshi's imperial castle. Joker also gave her a tour of the museums and brought her to watch the famous Bunraku (Puppet) theater. They went home a few days after, both with smiles on their faces.

"So, how did the reunion go?" Raiha greeted when they returned.

"It was much better than I hoped it would be." Joker honestly told his friend. "Right, Neon-han?"

"Whatever." she answered briefly before proceeding to her bedroom.

"What about that rival of yours, what's his name, Kaidou?" inquired the purple-haired ninja.

"Dying of envy...as he always is." the other man laughed. Neon had told him all the lies Kaidou had perpetuated to make himself look good. While he had bragged about having a law firm, a Mercedes collection and a supermodel wife, they had all proven to be half-truths. Neon had a chat with Kaidou's wife while in the ladies room and found out the bitter truth. Kaidou was indeed working in a law firm, but only as a secretary for one of the junior partners. The Mercedes collection he had been bragging about was nothing but a Matchbox Set and his wife *was* indeed a model before, not a ramp model, but a spokesmodel for a series of dishwasher-soap commercials. Joker had nothing to be insecured about, since much of his testimony had been real and not a figment of the imagination.

"You don't have to impress anybody, Joker-san." Neon told him after revealing what she had found out aboutKaidou. "The important thing is that you please yourself. And that's all that truy matters."

How true it was.

"Neon-saaaann!!!" Kirin called from the hallway. She was carrying a powder-blue envelope in her hand. "Oiiii! That's not yours!" she told the amber-eyed Uruha who took the envelope from her hands.

"I'm only curious." he smiled, showing his fanged beauties as he read the content of the blue envelope.

_This serves as an invitation to_

_Neon Iwahara_

_Alumnus, Class of 1993_

_Furinkan High School Reunion_

_on June 15, 2000_

_to be held at_

_Budokan Hall_

_New World Hotel_

_Tokyo_

_7:00 PM_

_Attire: Strictly Formal_

_RSVP_

_For particulars, contact: Jinei Ikari 1-800-100-8765_

_or Akemi Kudou 1-800-324-0139_

"Oh, Neon-haaaaan!!!!"

~THE END~

*******

Okay, uhhhmmm...was that as bad as I thought it was???? Hopefully not *_*. Anyhow, I have *no idea* what Neon's surname is so I just got some surname from a list of Jap surnames I have. If anyone knows what it is, let me knwo so I may correct it. Gosh that fic wasn't much...was it? *_* To send death threats to the author for wasting your net time and bandwidth, click here.

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